For Where There is FURY, WRATH is Likely

You know I haven't been blogging as much because I'm working every spare minute to finish my dissertation. However, a few things have occurred in the last 48 hours of which I must blog. First, I had taken two days off from the gym and last night decided to run a mile. I ran my best time and decided to go on for two miles. When I ran those two miles in under thirty minutes I slowed down to a brisk walk. I had taken a picture of the screen and sent it to my husband, my friend Sonya, and my first trainer. I said to my first trainer, "Did you ever even imagine this could happen?" He replied, "I did. I always did." AWWWWWW! The connection I had with Mike in this journey still exists. He believed in me before I ever had an inkling of what lied inside. He still does. Mike, I appreciate you more than words. In true Forest Gump mode, I thought I'm going to keep running. I ran three miles in under 43 minutes. I have NEVER done that before. My friend Belinda was on the stepper next to me. I had tears in my eyes. I couldn't believe what I had just done. It was a milestone. You might also note that it is a milestone that I am sharing with you what my actual times are. I have kept my times to myself because running has continually been a struggle for me. Remember the days when I wouldn't run a mile at all? When I couldn't run 5 minutes without feeling as though I was going to die? As such, I compete with myself. I don't compete with others on this journey. This is a me thing. I know there are many out there running way faster than Bunchy. I'm happy for you. I just don't want to set myself up for failure by getting caught up in trying to run faster than someone else. I don't know if this makes sense, but I have to get completely comfortable with myself as a runner. I've been working on this for two years. Not intensely, obviously. However, this month I've been using a 1 mile run as a warm up. This morning I had to go to the doctor for a follow up appointment. There was Brenda at the front desk. She said, "Your hair? What are you trying to be a model?" This resulted in a big smile from me. I told her about my friend Miah who had noticed my hair just the day before and said, "First it's the skinny walk and then it's the hair. Look at her. Look at her." Then the Dr comes in the room and says "You absolutely glow. I've never seen you healthier than in these last few months. He went over all of my numbers from my recent blood work and told me how impressed he was. He went on to say that he had been sharing my story with a couple of other patients who were struggling with their weight. He needs them to talk with me because he knows I can talk about how difficult the journey has been, but how rewarding at the same time. We agreed that I need to finish the dissertation first and then I will ABSOLUTELY help these people. For if I can help one person, just one find the happiness and health I have found then it's all worth it. Now to the fury... Tonight at the gym I decided to run a mile for a warm up. I wasn't trying to beat my time. I just wanted to run a mile. This really good song came on my playlist and I increased the speed on the treadmill. Before I knew it, I had done a 12:30 mile. Now Readers, I'm not sure what moves were coming out of my body at that point. There was jumping, dancing, tears streaming down my face. My friend Belinda was there. I immediately went to her and showed her my time. She said "You are such an inspiration." (She's as much an inspiration to me as she claims I am to her.) Then I ran out of the gym to call my mom. When I was back inside and talking to Belinda for a minute my trainer had finished with his client. I was still doing the happy dance and saying things like "I can't believe I just did that." Brandon gives me a look. I said "I just ran my fastest mile. I did it Brandon. I did it." He rolled his eyes. Belinda said,"Does he have an excitement button?" Brandon said, "She hasn't found it yet." Then he asked me what my heart rate was. It was in the 160's. So I thought I would tell him how proud my doctor is of me and how he wants me to speak with a few others who are struggling and Brandon rolled his eyes again. He never smiled, he never said Good Job. After he rolled his eyes the second time he left. I looked at Belinda and said, "Did that just happen?" She said it did. I said, "Am I overreacting?" She said "Oh no. I can't believe the way he just treated you." I'm fuming. I pay this man a lot of money. Not just to help me in my fitness journey, but to celebrate. Over the last few weeks, I've realized there has been little celebrating with Brandon. Even Jillian celebrates with her clients on Biggest Loser. And she's the meanie! I didn't make it to my session with Brandon on Saturday. We were supposed to measure so now we are doing that tomorrow. We then have two more workout sessions. After the measurements, I will be letting Brandon know that those next two sessions are not necessary. I want my results so far though which is the only reason I'm meeting him tomorrow. That is the wrath. I'm going to let him know that I was in tears with a friend on the phone after I finished my workout because not only did he do nothing to celebrate my accomplishment, he actually took away from it with his cynical look and attitude. Hopefully, he will accept responsibility for his actions and he won't have to see the wrath. In reality, he made me feel like I was a nobody and why would I get so excited about running? There are choice words that describe he and his attitude! As far as I am concerned, he can hit the road!!!